Well today's run was the worst to date. Woke up early, thought right I'm really going to push myself today and run as far as I can go. I even took some advice to take my Ventolin inhaler 15 minutes before running to make sure asthma didn't hold me back.
I tried honestly I did, even when I hit the pain barrier I carried on determined to further my running distance. I managed just over a mile before I had to stop. My legs felt fine, so did my feet. It came down too my troublesome chest again.
This is when I got angry and a bit upset with myself if I'm honest. I genuinely got tears in my eyes. Frustration came in waves of anger and I got very wound up. Looking like a psychotic, red faced loon is not a look that suits me.
Yes this sounds silly, I know it's only running but I'm a very proud person and failure is a word I don't want in my vocabulary. I don't want to let anyone down least of all myself on the day.
I know people keep saying who cares if you walk most the race, just take your time. But I can't I want to prove to myself that I am capable of completing something successfully.
To cool off (my mind and body) I decided to walk the mile lap of the lake and time myself just to see how long it may take if I have to walk some of the 10k. I walked a mile in 14 and a half minutes. This means I'm probably looking at the hour and a half mark of finishing the race if I walk and run.
I'm panicking that my body doesn't want me to do well. Maybe I need to swallow my pride a bit and just accept that where ever i finish on the day it doesn't matter.
I wish I wasn't so stubborn!
I'm really going to push these next three weeks though, I want to finish in a good time and I will.
Next time you see me looking miserable, say something nice to me or better still give me (a little) slap!
Off to drown my sorrows now with a lovely cup of tea. Could just do with a big bar of chocolate to accompany it...oh wait I gave that up for Lent didn't I boo. I'm a bit sadistic torturing myself like this aren't I?
Oh and to top off today's rubbish day of training I've got a small blister forming on the back of my foot. Great. Thank you very much new trainers!
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You'll be fine on race day. As soon as the adrenalin kicks in you won't be able to stop.
ReplyDeleteTry interval training or whatever it's called, when you run as fast as you can then slow down, they run as fast as you can again.
ReplyDeleteIt's a fast way to improve your fitness and may make doing a steady jog easier when you come back to it.
Dude this blog is SO good! It's amazing how you've managed to write so much about running and make it sound so interesting! I've read all your posts so far and I have a concentration span of a 6 year old with adhd...so you should be proud :)
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